Droopy’s Technical Support

Good morning ma’am, my name is Droopy
How may I help you?

I sit here each day talking to people on the phone
answering their questions in my slow deadpan drone
they get impatient as I slowly try to explain
there’s nothing wrong with their PC

Ma’am click on the start button, then click on control panel
double-click on the system icon but don’t do anything
unless I tell you to – no
                                                stop
                                                                        I’m wrong that’s not right
close that window, it won’t help

My boss gets mad that it takes me so long on each call
but it’s hard to get all these big words out of my saggy jaws
and even though my colleagues get thirty or more customers
for me getting four done, I think, is a pretty good day

But the biggest deal of all comes when I get upset
a hush drops over the office
                        and everyone holds their breath when I say
“You know what… that makes me mad.”